Monday, October 5, 2009

New Hues

A fellow blogger, Kimmie, saw my last post and felt led to e-mail me a doctored version of the photo. She said this is what "God may have allowed my dad to see". What she didn't know was that the day before he died, my dad mentioned how the colors he was seeing were different. I just figured the morphine was affecting his vision. I was so touched that someone I don't really even know would take the time to speak to my heart like this. Here is the picture she sent:

Friday, October 2, 2009

A Change of Seasons

This season is bittersweet for me. It was 3 years ago this month that I lost my father to cancer. As the mornings turn cool and the leaves begin to change colors, I am reminded of the change of season in my life when my dad was here one day and gone the next. It happened so quickly that I still sometimes still find it hard to believe. It's like when autumn is at its peak and you want so badly for it to stay that way for longer so you can enjoy the fireworks of colors God splatters on the landscape... and before you really get a chance to take it all in, the leaves turn brown and fall off the trees. That's how it was for me in October of 2006. My parents had just moved into a house they built after sacrificing for so many years. My dad was getting ready to enjoy his retirement. I was finally able to give him the granddaughter he grew to love so much. We had just opened the B&B and everything was going great. It was a colorful life. Then it all changed and suddenly everything felt brown and barren. But I keep pressing on knowing that my dad would want me to enjoy this season of my life. Each day is such a gift from God. So I take time this autumn to reflect on my dad and how he helped me enjoy the seasons of life here on earth and to not be afraid of moving into the next life in heaven. I'll never forget his words "It's beautiful there", spoken with such conviction just the day before he died. I truly believe he got a glimpse of a place even more beautiful than the most perfect autumn day with those spashes of many colors dotting the landscape in a way that only God could paint.
This is what my parents' front yard looked like the week before my dad passed away. I had taken the picture and brought it to his hospital room so he could have a piece of his home with him there.